For many people, divorce is an upsetting experience. It changes your life not only emotionally, but financially. Over the past few years, couples going through a divorce have begun to use a divorce mediator to try to lessen the emotional and financial blows of a divorce. If you are dealing with a difficult divorce, the experienced divorce attorneys at The Law Office of Stephen Vertucci can offer you guidance and representation.
What Is Divorce Mediation?
Divorce mediation is a process that takes place before going to court. Mediators are trained to help you and your ex-spouse navigate the logistical complexities of a divorce. They have a structured process and serve as an impartial and unbiased third party. The mediator cannot make any decisions or rulings, so they have no say in what the final rulings are in the proceedings. A mediator can help guide conversations, so they remain productive and positive instead of dissolving into arguments and insults.
The Benefits of Divorce Mediation
The first major benefit of divorce mediation is that it is easier for the child. Divorces are often accompanied by fighting and tension, which is hard for a child to experience. It is even more difficult if the child has to go to court and decide which parent they want to live with. Mediators can help you focus on how everything will affect your child instead of getting too absorbed in disputes between you and your spouse.
A mediator can help you and your spouse discuss issues calmly and find a compromise without needing to become aggressive or angry. They are representing both of your best interests, so it is less of a competition.
In many divorces, people lose significant amounts of money. Mediation is a far less expensive option. Mediations usually resolve faster, as getting a court date can take months. The faster your case is resolved, the less money you need to spend on expenses like attorney fees. Because you and your spouse are both working with the same person, your costs are already much less than if you went to court with individual legal representation. Mediation is less about winning than court cases are. In mediation, each person is more focused on compromise and solving problems together as quickly as possible.
Mediation is an extremely empowering experience. Instead of leaving all the work up to an attorney, you and your spouse are sitting down and representing yourselves in a conversation about your future. You and your spouse are in control of the situation.
Advice for Those Seeking Divorce Mediation
If you are entering into a divorce mediation, stay focused on the end result. Even if you and your spouse are angry and upset with each other, it is important to keep the conversations productive, so you can find the best compromise for you both.
Having a great mediator is a vital part of successful divorce mediations. Many mediators will have a background in law, psychology or social work and experience with the divorce laws in your state. The Mediation Association of Colorado specifies the training required to work as a mediator.
Once you have found a mediator, make sure to keep in mind what their role is. Do not go into mediations expecting them to fix your marriage or be a therapist for you and your spouse. Mediations will be more successful if you remember they are there with the specific goal of helping you and your spouse reach a compromise.
If You Are Going Through a Divorce
Mediation can be an extremely effective option to make your divorce as quick and painless as possible. A mediator can save you substantial amounts of money and emotional damage while you are trying to get through an extremely complicated and upsetting time.